Internet Fame

Would you like to know how well-known you are in the Internet? One way to gauge your status is to Google yourself, then Google other items and compare the number of hits. For example, Google found me on about 20 pages. (Note that there is another Ben Schwalb, a film producer, who got a lot more hits than I did.) Then I Googled the following:

sesquipedalian
horsehockey
pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
"gurn blanston"
craptastic
“offal soup”
superkiwi
"ninja nun"
“uvula cancer”

You know what? Every single word and phrase got more hits than I did. That’s right, folks. I am more obscure than uvula cancer and offal soup.

Then I wondered if there is anything I am more famous than. It took a lot of trial and error, but I came up with the following:

"gastronomic helicopter" (3 hits)
“dancing in tapioca” (2 hits)
"when llamas fly" (3 hits)
"enjoyable Hugh Grant film" (0 hits)
"Paris Hilton has integrity" (2 hits)

Now, before you think that the last phrase means that someone out there thinks Paris Hilton has integrity, the actual sentences that contain the phrase are:

“And, if you think Paris Hilton has integrity, character and honor, maybe you should see a psychiatrist.”
“Paris Hilton has integrity?”